Saturday, November 2, 2024

Needed Shame

"Now this is what the Sovereign LORD says: I will give you what you deserve, for you have taken your solemn vows lightly by breaking your covenant...you will remember with shame all the evil you have done...You will remember your sins and cover your mouth in silent shame when I forgive you of all that you have done. I, the Sovereign LORD, have spoken!'" Ezekiel 16:59, 61, 63

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Earlier today I was speaking with a friend and we were discussing sin. Quite the topic for a 5am conversation. She was relaying to me something she had witnessed by those claiming the name of Christ. Instead of expressing remorse over what had touched their lives, these women were presenting it as "normal" and acceptable, even glamourizing and defending what should be breaking their hearts.

Because shame is often associated with condemnation, we are very quick, as Christ-followers, to denounce this as a negative emotion, but is it always a harmful response that should be avoided? It was just within the last year I discovered verses in Psalm 83 where Asaph prays for God to use shame as a tool that awakens those partaking in evil to the realization of their actions. He prays, "Fill their faces with shame, that they may seek Your name, O LORD. Let them be put to share...May they know You alone, whose name is the LORD, are the Most Hight over all the earth." The purpose of shame is to bring them to their senses, see their sin, and seek the Lord.

I will quickly add here that there is definitely some perverted and misdirected shame that has been heaped on undeserving individuals either from others or self-inflicted. This is not the shame I am considering today. That type of shame is always harmful and often requires the help of others so it can be identified and healed.

Shame, however, is not a bad thing when it leads to a good thing. Often it is shame that causes us to recognize sin, which can then be confessed and repented, moving us forward to forgiveness and sanctification. It troubles me when I see those dismissing sin too quickly, like it never happened. Yes, the Lord does remove it as far as the east is to the west (Psalm 103:12), but it's scar should humble us. Romanticizing sin and trivializing it only encourages others to do likewise, embracing their sin, viewing it as inconsequential, while softening the reality of God's holiness.

It is true, as believers there are things scripture tells us of which we should never feel ashamed. Paul writes in 2 Timothy 1:8, "never be ashamed to tell others about our Lord." Jesus adds to this in Mark 8:38 saying, "If anyone is ashamed of Me and My message in these adulterous and sinful days, the Son of Man will be ashamed of that person when He returns in the glory of His Father with the holy angels." Peter also encourages us in 1 Peter 4:16, "it is no shame to suffer for being a Christian. Praise God for the privilege of being called by His name!" John Piper, responding to a question regarding shame sums it up like this: "Don't feel shame for something that honours God, no matter how weak or foolish it makes you look in the eyes of others." 

Shame also has great value in the redemptive process of lives turning to Christ. For those who too casually respond to sin, Paul instructs, "Stay away from them so they will be ashamed" (2 Thessalonians 2:14b). We all need to be impacted by shame temporarily when we are walking in disobedience. Distancing ourselves briefly from those participating in and pursuing sinful behaviour, for the purpose of calling their activity to attention, can have beneficial results.

If a path we are walking includes anything that is not honouring to the Lord, we should feel some humiliation and discomfort. It worries me when life can go on as usual without any evidence of recognizing sinful ways, especially with those in positions of influence. Today's Christian almost rejoices when they see a leader commit sin and continue offering teaching without a blip in their schedule. To me, their audience then feels their own personal disobedience can also be condoned far too easily.

Lord, would You show us our hearts. Maybe some time of "silent shame" is what we need most to bring us back in close and vital fellowship with You. After feeling the weight, help us move forward in a way that honours You.

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