Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Who Am I?

"Who am I, O LORD...that You have brought me this far?"  1 Chronicles 17:16

A devotional I was reading this morning concluded with a question that overwhelms me as I consider all the Lord has done.  "Who am I, O LORD...that You have brought me this far?"  My "this far" has contained countless blessings.  Who am I Lord, that You would favour me and look upon the details of my life, gracing me with so many touches from Your Hand?

As I reflect back over my previous and my present, God's faithfulness is woven through even the most complicated of tapestries, and the most recent as yesterday's stitching.

Since early December my family has been wrapped in the unexpected need of caring for two aging parents.  My mom had a terrible fall that sent her to the hospital on December 8th.  Currently at a Rehabilitation Center out of town, she has also been in quarantine with flu-like symptoms.  As mom was primary care-giver for my dad who requires 24/7 care, the concern of finding long-term nursing assistance for him has arisen.  My two sisters and myself have been spending our days between the hospital and our parent's home doing all we can to minister to our mom and dad.

Yesterday, at crisis point, with details too many to relate, we were asked to take dad to a nursing facility that would not have been our choice, but it was the only one with a room available.  As weary as we are my sisters and I called out to the Lord to help us in the decision making.  There were many tears.  We are physically exhausted, but we want the best for our dad.  We surrendered to the very real possibility that dad may have to stay at this nursing home until another option becomes available.  It was breaking our hearts.

When the Case Worker called back about 2 hours later, a miracle had taken place.  The only facility with a bed, the one we didn't want dad to go to, had been removed from the list due to an outbreak of flu, no-one would be moving in or out.  The Lord had removed this nursing home from the list and taken the decision out of our hands. God didn't want dad there either *smile*.

Although this means more time in the waiting and uncertainties, He has brought us "this far" and we continue to wait on Him for our daily strength and guidance.

Yes, Lord, who am I that You would care so tenderly, giving me the assurance that Your plans will prevail in all my concerns for mom and dad.  You have a perfect placement for dad, and until that door opens, I will wait on You.  Thank You for closing this door so quickly and demonstrating Your love for us all.  I know You will continue to breathe life into my tired soul.

Overwhelmed by Your care.  Who am I....just a weary child, calling out to her Heavenly Father and believing He will be there.

post signature


Jill Beran said...

I love this post and the way God worked for you and your family Joy! He cares about the details and He truly speaks to our hearts and provides for our needs!!

Your words here remind me of the writing project God's put on my heart - a book with the same title as your post. I recall asking God this same question and in response to my question He asked one of His own, "Jill, Who am I?" Oh if I could keep my eyes on Him and remember who He is...then perhaps I can be who He made me to be!!!

Thanks so much Joy for sharing these thoughts and the verse...blessed me today!! Praying He provides clarity for your decisions and gives peace and strength while you wait!!

Love you,

~Grace and Peace said...

Thank you for sharing God's provision for you and your family. You know I asked the same question when I started reading Hebrews 1 for my Precept class.

Hebrews: 1-2 God, after He spoke long ago to the fathers in the prophets in many portions and in many ways, in these last days has spoken to us in His Son, whom He appointed heir of all things, through whom also He made the world.

I made a note, "God still speaks to us. Why? What makes us so special?" He IS God, the Creator of all things. We are a very small dot in a great big universe. My mind can't grasp that. That overwhelming kind of attention. I don't understand it but I'll take it. And I'm so thankful for it.