Tuesday, November 10, 2009


"Saul is my chosen instrument..." Acts 9:15

Ironic how God would take me from "Overlooked" yesterday to "Chosen" today. I'm starting to think that sometimes being overlooked is OK.

Longing to be chosen.

Wanting to hear my name, I stood waiting. I knew I wouldn't be in the first "draft pick" as the captains requested players for their teams. Not being athletic at all, I hated spring, gym class and baseball practice. By default, not decision, one poor captain would finally, reluctantly resign to calling my name. It was always said with such defeat, assuming that whichever team had me, had the loss. How I longed to be chosen.

Don't we all wave our hands, yelling "pick me, pick me" when some glorious opportunity presents itself? But, do we always want to be chosen?

Just today I've received messages from two moms. Both were chosen. One to walk a path of happiness, the other a path of heartache. One to walk a road of miracles, the other a road of mourning. One was chosen for a path of healing, the other heaven. One son returned. One son taken.

I'm not saying the choice of heaven isn't wonderful, but it is hard for those left behind. I'm sure this mom is asking, "Lord, why did You choose me for this? I didn't want to be chosen. I don't want to play this game. The weight of the 'bat' is too heavy and the 'ball' came too fast and unexpectedly. I'm running 'bases' right now, trying to hang on until the final inning, but I just want to be declared 'out' so I can go sit on the bench and have a good cry. My life has received a 'foul'. I'm jealous of the other mom who got her 'strike' and everyone is cheering and high-fiving. Why isn't that me? I want it to be me. Why was I chosen for the 'strike out'? Why?"

Beth Moore says that if God should choose us, or call us to a death that demands courage, then somehow death itself must be a great part of our destiny story. I believe that is true, both for those taken, and those who remain behind.

Will I surrender to whatever God may chose for me? Is my hand still waving in the air as I jump up and down repeating, "Lord, whatever You have for me, pick me, pick me."

Today I read, "Saul is my chosen instrument." For what was he chosen? Saul was not seeking salvation, yet he was chosen to receive God's free gift. No one can be saved apart from an act of God. No one is too far gone to be outside of God's saving reach. Saul was God's vessel of choice to go from destructive to instrumental. From self-promoter to God-presenter. From causing suffering to bearing suffering. Saul didn't decide for Christ, Christ decided for Saul. How encouraging this is for me as I have family and friends, who like Saul, want nothing to do with Jesus. Like Peter told Simon, God's gift cannot be bought. Salvation is a gift, not a commodity. It's about life-change, not life-insurance.

What path has God currently chosen for you?

Fill your name in the blank. "___________" is my chosen instrument.

Play on.

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Deb said...

I didn't get picked either.

Until He chose me.

Stop by if you get a chance; I have something for you.

Sweet dreams.

~Grace and Peace said...

I love this post. So many truths to it. Thank you for sharing what God reveals to you and being used by Him to minister to us.