My Only Strength

"But David found strength in the LORD his God." 1 Samuel 30:6b

Where does your strength come from? No, seriously. Think about it. If you're a Christ-follower, don't be too quick to give the "God answer." How do you find strength when you are physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually depleted? Do you rely on a good night's rest to refresh you? Is there a friend you call to share your struggles knowing you'll receive their encouragement? Do you throw yourself into activity to keep yourself busy so you don't have to deal with the root of your current weakness? Maybe you simply ignore your lack, pushing back, a smile covering the weight of the world you are carrying that is pulling you silently under. And then, possibly you isolate, withdrawing yourself from further contact and attack.

David was facing an angry troop who were threatening stoning him, bitter and hurting over the captivity of their families. Feeling the blame of his men, David is distressed, exhausted and weak in physical strength and heart. There are times when no one around us can give us the encouragement and strength we need. It's at these moments we must strengthen ourselves in the Lord. God will transform painful to both precious and purposeful while maturing us at the same time as we lean on Him.

When God calls us to strengthen ourselves in Him, it is a place we must go with God alone. It's a time when He places us in His intensive care. Most often overwhelming situations have arisen and we feel broken. We wrestle to know God's will and understand His plan. As we look to Him for His strength, we begin to come to a place of acceptance. God begins to do a changing work in us.

Sometimes all of these truths we read in God's word are only theories until they become an act of trust. Nothing prepares you to respond to a knock on the door and be met by a police officer informing you that your husband has been in a car accident as a result of a cardiac arrest, currently without vitals. It is in that second, when without the Lord's sustaining arms you would collapse, you cry out for His strength and find it as sufficient and sustaining as He has always described it to be and you learn that pain is part of His strengthening process.

As I reflect back on that day over nine months ago, and as I continue to walk this journey with my husband's health, I can testify that God has carried me and is still enabling me to do, go, see, and stand in places I would have guaranteed that I could never have endured without crumbling, and yet, I did, I am and I will. As Beth Moore writes, "What comes out of a battle isn't nearly as important as who comes out of a battle." God is working in me and through me, drawing me to a deeper knowing of who He is through all He is providing by His strength in me.

Father, my heart's desire is to depend on You. I want the faith that is credited to me as righteousness. I long for unwavering belief in Your promises. I recognize that it is often only through pathways of severe, unwanted battles that this depth of knowing You emerges, and that can frighten me. In honesty, I really don't want to experience the very things that will draw me to a deeper dependence on You. How I wish the way to knowing You more was always pleasant and peaceful...easy. Lord, forgive me for all the times I have looked to my own strength, or the strength of others for my provision. I thank You for every time You have carried me and opened my eyes to see You in ways I never would have met You without the trial before me. Thank You for always knowing exactly what I need to touch my life to help me see You, all that is required to change me into Your likeness. Ultimately that is my longing. As days and weeks turn into months, and when I feel exhausted, forgotten and weary, Your strength remains without decrease. It is as strong today as it was yesterday and will be tomorrow. May my life give testimony of who You are so that You are glorified. It is in my weakness that Your strength is seen.

And Joy found strength in the LORD her God.