Let It Not Be In Vain

"Have you experienced so much for nothing? Surely it was not in vain, was it?" Galatians 3:4

Sitting in the Hospital Emergency waiting room, knowing that I would soon be called for my first ever contrast CT scan, I literally was shaking like a leaf. The room had the air conditioner running full, constant and high. The cold air, mixed with my trembling nerves, made it hard to even send a short text, fingers faltering. I had decided to complete my daily Bible reading and invite God to speak to my heart. I was reading along from Galatians 3 when the Lord took my attention. My breath caught in my throat as I read God's questions above. It was as if His very voice was calling directly to me. Joy, have you experienced so much in the past for nothing? Surely it was not in vain, was it? Apply now what you have learned previously

Lord, I'm so sorry. Yes, You are right. I have seen Your loving, gracious hand provide again and again. Each encounter has meant so very much. Oh, why do we waver so much in trust. It makes me cry when I think about all the ways the Lord has shown Himself mighty on my behalf and yet a new concern arises and so does my anxiety. Trust involves surrendering my concerns and resting in God's provision and promises. Faith let's go and leans on the Lord. It's so easy to express trust in words, but evident trust is a different story. 

Time after time God has been so faithful to me. Big ways. Small ways. All the in-between ways. How is my life demonstrating to Him and to others that the countless times He has stepped in and provided in such personal ways has made a lasting impact on my life? Is it seen in...

the anxiety I have over my own health concerns?

the worry I have for my husband's continued heart care?

sleepless nights where sudden doubts replace sweet dreams?

sidestepping new opportunities from a place of fear?

grasping tightly to what is seen and who is seen instead of the unseen?

insecurity in provision?

avoiding steps outside my comfort zone to follow His dreams for me?

over-protecting and under-depending?

living life in a safe zone instead of a faith zone?

Heavenly Father I'm so sorry for every time I allow myself to fill with fear and don't trust You to care for me. Your presence with me doesn't mean that hardships won't happen, but it means You will never leave me or forsake me. In every situation You are there. How I long to speak the dialect of faith fluently and live it consistently.

As a teenager a song often rang through my head. Written by Amy Grant, Brown Bannister and Gary Chapman, "Don't Give Up On Me" recognized that we haven't "arrived" yet. There is still so much growing and changing, depending and trusting, releasing and loving. We will have moments when the world overwhelms and panic pursues. That's when His Word must infuse and our minds must recall past experiences that laid the foundation for this new scary moment.

Six hours at a hospital with tests and unknowns certainly invites concerns, many of which could be very legitimate, but we must never forget God hasn't changed. Our past God-stories must remind today's challenges to trust in the Lord.